My wife, Carolina, and I made a film, Expressway to Your Skull. It's not even close to the first film I've made, not even the first film my wife and I made together, but it ended up being the most challenging film to cross the finish line and the one we are most proud of.

I want to share some of this story with you here and hope you can take something positive from our experience.

THREE DAYS IN.

I had accumulated seven days of vacation time at work, so I scheduled and budgeted a seven-day shoot, taking the entire week off to avoid unnecessary outside interruptions.

Then, three days into production, I discovered through the grapevine that I would be fired once I returned. This was our only source of income and, therefore, our primary source of funds for production.

It threw a heavy wrench into the mix and would have massively delayed production if we had not already paid for most of the props, key equipment, and locations ahead of time.

We continued as much as possible, aware that some delays may be inevitable. The irony was that I had a hell of a lot more free time to make the film, so our new goal was (as pathetic as it may sound) to wait for unemployment to help finish production.

TORNADO POWER.

While unloading production costs on credit and relying on the slow trickle of unemployment to fill the gaps, we continued to make progress until nature intervened with a tornado smashing into our neighborhood, nearly destroying our home and taking power out of the entire area for quite some time (turns out it was for a little over a week).

We felt like the place we called home was trying to spit us out; between being unemployed, the tornado, and no electricity, Carolina and I decided to get out of dodge. Principal photography at the primary location was nearly wrapped, and we had family out in Oregon, a place we felt could be a more welcoming environment for a fresh start.

THE FRESH START…

We had just crossed the Oregon border, close to 20 hours into the road trip and less than five hours away from our new home, when we got in a terrible car accident. The worst part was how much footage we lost and all the equipment to finish the film! The computer, camera, lenses, etc., were gone! Who cares if my wife's leg is broken? Do you know how beautiful that one take was? We can't recapture that kind of magic! I'm a goddam artist!

All kidding aside, saying we are grateful to be alive is an understatement. We survived the beating, and Carolina did get the worst of it with a broken leg; there were shots where we hid the cast or used a cheap mannequin leg in lieu of hers. We recovered as much footage from the destroyed computer as possible, but my top priority for the next few months was caring for Carolina, film second.

CALL IT QUITS?

Throughout my wife's recovery, I never stopped thinking about production; I believe anyone driven to filmmaking through need, not want, understands the inherent urge to find a way to make things happen.

Up to this point in my 'career,' I had made many films with the outward appearance of no momentum, progress, or success. My vast collection of rejection letters that could weigh down an elephant would argue in favor of the above.

I can imagine a world where my partner may look at the circumstances surrounding this film and say enough is enough, but I cannot imagine a world where I give up. Thankfully, when I first met my wife, she understood what I wanted more than anything was to make films, and her response to these circumstances was beyond supportive. She has told me before that whatever rejection or adversity we encounter, I won't be a failure in her eyes unless I quit trying.

Each film I made may, at a certain point, have felt redundant, something that took so much time, money, and heart to simply collect dust on the proverbial shelf, but combining those experiences with a relentless drive and desire for growth, I was slowly paving the way forward, with each film providing a step in the right direction toward my dream.

MOVING FORWARD A STEP AT A TIME.

When I lost my job, my first thought was not, 'Well, I guess we can't finish the movie.' My instinct was, 'What can we do to finish the movie?' I approached the material from the perspective of what we could do to make this happen without sacrificing the intent; what creative approach can we take to execute this production as written?

For instance, we had initially requested the service of a paramedic team and their ambulance for a scene where one of our characters is being carted into the back of the vehicle. Unfortunately, we could no longer afford their service, but I could afford a U-Haul van for a few hours, and I had the ability to light the scene with make-shift sirens, but would that work? It's a potential solution but brings up the concern of quality, which is that a sacrifice too enormous or misguided could negatively redirect the intent or idea; will it come off as an Our Gang appearance of, 'Let's put on a show!'

But the show must go on, so we adapt, change the perspective of the characters, and manipulate the scene with emotional visuals and tone; we find a way to get the job done.

It can be challenging to keep moving forward after so much bullshit gets thrown your way, but it goes without saying that if your dreams or goals are ahead of you, the only way to get there is to keep moving forward; it's better to do something, then to do nothing, because doing something brings new experiences, and from experience you get growth, and this is the fuel that drives you along your path you set before you.

WE MADE A MOVIE, WHO CARES?

After overcoming so many exhaustive obstacles and ending up with a film we were insanely proud of, I wanted feedback and perspective (and validation, if sincere) more than anything.

I am sure we all know that it is difficult to find anyone on the inside to reach out to, and even if you did, convincing them to put 15 minutes aside (at minimum) to watch the film can feel like a Sisyphean task.

Then, I discovered Stage 32. Not only did their platform provide feedback for short films, but people with experience would actually watch the whole thing, bypassing the painful reality that some submissions to festivals or grants may get a disingenuous skim through at best! I jumped at the opportunity to discuss the material personally through a Reel/Short Film Review and connected with Producer, Nick Phillips, Stage 32's Executive Liaison.

Nick Phillips's name stuck out because I've rewatched every season of Project Greenlight more times than I'd like to admit, and I recognized him from Season 3. It may have been serendipity (we surprisingly have the same birthday) because out of anyone I could have chosen, I discovered someone who connected with the material and understood what I was trying to achieve with the film.

It could also be that I have worked hard enough at this point in my filmmaking career that I finally created something substantial enough to warrant validation. Either way, Nick's appreciation for the film brought infectious enthusiasm to the project, and his feedback was invaluable in making it a better experience.

I cannot speak for him, but I assume at a certain juncture from our back-and-forth feedback discussions, Nick felt there was something special here, enough to put his name on the work as a Producer to hopefully get more eyes on the experience, which I am forever grateful for.

Reaching out of the void and having his external input has been like drinking water after being stranded on a deserted island for over 15 years.

SEE YOU AT THE MOVIES!

Now, we play the inevitable waiting game to see where the movie will be seen; a world premiere at Cannes would be a dream come true!

In the meantime, we are using this positive momentum to work on the next stepping stones, which hopefully will lead to our first feature. I will be excited to share this continued experience as we move forward.

I hope this story provides insight into the value of perseverance in the face of adversity or the potential to grow in the face of rejection. While luck and timing can be key to finding success, tenacity, and hard work will get you there on time. I am grateful to Nick and this platform for helping to nudge me along a far more positive and inclusive path!

Let's hear your thoughts in the comments below!

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